Pregnancy Week 36- The Birth Plan

The term “Birth Plan” is actually a fairly new concept to me- as is much of what I’ve recently learned about having and rearing babies. It’s amazing how much information  you can learn in a short period of time when you’re looking in the right place. But more on that another post.

So what is a ‘Birth Plan’?  From what I gather, it’s something you’re supposed to write out that gives details on what you want to happen and what you don’t want to happen during your child’s birth. It was always said it’s something you’re supposed to take to the hospital with you so everyone involved can know what your wants are.

Now, here’s what never made sense to me, and why I never bothered with a “Birth Plan”, I’m supposed to write out what I want and don’t want and take it to the hospital with me when I go into labor, right? WHO on earth is going to bother reading it? I mean, really, I’m rushing around, contracting, in labor, in pain, getting undressed, getting set up, the nurses getting everything together, scrambling to get my paperwork, get whatever stuff they need to get set up for monitors, getting their charts started, calling the doctor on call blah blah blah…. Do I REALLY expect one of them to stop everything to read this stupid list I have written out?
Now, maybe I’m mistaken, but it seems like all of this stuff SHOULD be worked out with the OB oh, I don’t know, BEFORE it’s time to do everything? Like, maybe around this time frame that I’m in right now, there should be a ‘standardized’ yes/no/only if necessary list to be filled out and discussed between the two. Something quick and easy that can go into mom’s chart, so when it IS time for her to go into labor, anyone can glance at it quickly and know exactly what not to do.

Epidural- yes/no
Fetal Heartbeat/ Contraction monitors - yes/no  (You know, those annoying bands they wrap around your waist that continually monitor the heart rate of the baby and contractions, and sends of highly irritating alarms when you move just wrong and the monitors lose what they’re watching out for)
IV- yes/no (yes, this SHOULD be an option)
Vitamin K shot for baby- yes/no (I’ve only recently learned about this little thing they sneak in there without consent.)
Immediately cut cord- yes/no

Things like that.
I mean, after all, we, as moms, spend anywhere from 3-9 months thinking about these things, if we’re aware of our options that is. I think it would be nice if OBs would do a run down on what to expect during delivery as well. That would be nice and helpful. I mean, I know and understand that not everything can be planned out. Things happen, emergencies happen, but at least having an idea of what would happen in a smooth, routine delivery would be better than the absolutely nothing they do now.

I have NOTHING against OBs. I have NOTHING against hospital births. I’ve done it 4 times. As a matter of fact, you probably don’t want to hear my opinion on midwives. I’ve always had good experiences, and wonderful doctors and nurses. 2 nurses actually saved my son’s life when he came before the doctor got there and was born not breathing. But I think there may have been a few things I would have changed, had I known I had the options. That’s not to say I didn’t get what I want- I had vaginal births with my husband by my side. No epidurals or pain meds. And my last delivery my daughter was in the room as well. I can honestly say all 4 deliveries were good experiences.

That being said, I’ve recently learned about homebirths. My friend, Shanna’s, was actually the first I’d ever heard of. I wasn’t completely shocked, but it was just never something I’d even thought about. In the same way I’d just never even thought about to or not to breastfeed, to or not to cloth diaper… breastfeeding, hospital births, and disposable diapers were just ‘what you do’.

But the more I heard about homebirths the more interested I was. 3 out of 4 of my deliveries were inductions. Because I lived so far away from the hospital, it was a safety concern. Nobody wants to have their baby on the side of the highway. I had considered that this delivery would be the same as all the rest- induced in a hospital.  And then I started thinking more about home births.

Initially I didn't plan on one. I toyed with the idea in my head and considered it an option, but never figured I'd convince Mr. Prewitt to support me. I really didn't PLAN on anything. It was late January before I even called an OB. Had hubby not needed FMLA I probably wouldn't have even done that- despite his fairly regular nagging. I just didn’t feel like dealing with it. I hate having to find new doctors, and I was I the situation that I had to. My last OB left the city about 4 weeks after Tommy was born, and he had a private practice, so I was stuck.

But even with a new OB, a homebirth was still on my mind. I hadn’t discussed it with hubs, because even when I touched on the subject a few times, he gave me the crazy eyes.
Finally I asked him, “why don’t you want me to have a homebirth?” And we had a nice little discussion about it. Initially he was scared to death. My one, and only, non-induced, all natural birth didn’t go well. Both Nicky and I almost didn’t make it out of that one alive. So I can understand his fears. What if it happens again and I’m 1 ½ hours from the hospital? It was a possibility. Something bad COULD happen.
On the other hand, I was tired of being poked and prodded. I was tired of having monitors stuck to my belly. I was tired of pitocin drips and ice chips. I’ve done it 3 times, I want to try something new. Especially considering we’ve decided this is our last baby. I’ve changed a lot of the ways I parent in the last 8 years, and everything has managed to work out well. Why not change how we bring our child into the world?

The thing I said that I think finally really changed his mind was- you’ll be the first person to touch our baby. That really got him.

So, what’s my birth plan?

I want my mattress on the floor in the big play room, with my babies all around me and love in the air.
I want my husband there to deliver 7 and be the first person with his hands on the baby.
I want ALL of my children to witness the miracle of childbirth and get to snuggle their new sibling without anyone’s concern but hubby’s and my own.

I want this to be the best, most memorable, and the most different birth than I’ve ever had before.

I can’t wait.

Seedhouse Awesomeness!

About 2 or 3 days after I built my greenhouse I pretty much started my seeds over from scratch. I only had a couple of trays started anyway, and most of them were killed when my son decided to put them ON the furnace. So I just started over :)
I took a short 'organic gardening' class the year before last, and the instructor there told me that I should use the styrafoam egg crates instead of the biodegradable. So I started saving ALL of my egg crates to start seeds in. I rarely buy the styrafoam ones, because I buy my eggs in the large 5 1/2 dozen boxes, or occasionally the mediums will be cheaper, but still in the biodegradable cartons. So the majority of what I had saved was the biodegradable ones. Which actually wound up being a good thing, and here's why- I got the majority of my seeds planted before we left on vacation. The day we left, I put some extra water on all of them, to make sure they didn't dry out while we were gone. The plan was to be gone for a week, so I was worried.
We were only gone for 5 days and when we came back there was a HORRIBLE smell in the greenhouse. Turned out the styrafoam cartons, which don't have any kind of drainage, were just holding the water, and the seeds weren't soaking ANY up, so they, and the soil, just rotted. Luckily I only had like 4 foam crates, so I didn't lose too terribly much, and now I've learned my lesson- stick with the biodegradable ones. They are like a thick paper, so they absorb excess water and allow for drainage.

So, aside from the death of those few plants, I'm absolutely loving my green house and the awesomeness that I'm growing within!! Here's some progress pics!

Flowers

 Pumpkins

 Green beans and Scarlet Runner Beans

Peas

 Spinach

 Beets

 Broccoli

 Cotton

 Bellpeppers

 2 trays of carrots

 Tomatoes

 Celery

Cabbage

 Just Scarlet Runner Beans

 More flowers

 Leeks

 Bellpeppers

 more bellpeppers

 Brussel Sprouts

 Corn

 Potato Barrels

 Here are my shelves :)

 And my potato barrels (garbage cans LOL)

7's Featured Music This Week

 The song I chose tonight I actually changed my mind on after searching the first out in youtube.
I try to post songs that have some kind of meaning, and, well, the first one- while an incredible song with some meaning- just felt like it was not right. So I searched again and found a good video of the second song I switched to.
This song is a lot of fun, the video is really cute, and the meaning... well... listen and read for yourself :)

Sawyer Brown- This Thing Called Wanting and Having it All

Rich man grew old on a mansion on top of a hill
Now he's sittin at a table with his lawyer over his will
Cause he's ill
The kids don't call, they're waitin on the man to die
He's gonna leave em all a little something
But they're gonna be real surprised

There's a poor man living on a budget at the bottom of that hill
He's got a wife and two kids and a worried mind
About how he's gonna pay the bills
But, only the rich man knows
See that's where a lot of this money goes-
To a man who brought wood in the winter
To take a little weight off of his shoulders

There's this thing called wanting and having it all
If you're gonna get there you're gonna have to walk
But first you'll have to crawl
Oh you know you gotta do it step by step
Miss one and you'll fall
Into this well called wanting and having it all

The poor man has everything that the rich man wants
He's got a love in his life and his heart
He's got a house he calls home
The rich man owns everything for miles around
But what he needs can't be bought, it has to be found
His rich kids think that they're better cause they're better off
That's how they grew up thinking and now he thinks that's all his fault
So while there's still time, their daddy that they nickel and dime
Is gonna make em learn to take a turn and stand in line

For this thing called wanting and having it all

If you're gonna get there you're gonna have to walk
But first you'll have to crawl
Oh you know you gotta do it step by step
Miss one and you'll fall
Into this well called wanting and having it all

See life's full of changes and wanting right now
What you only see in your dreams
I know you don't like it
And think it's the strangest thing you've ever seen
There ain't nothing you can do about it

See there's this thing called wanting and having it all
If you're gonna get there you're gonna have to walk
But first you'll have to crawl
Oh you know you gotta do it step by step
Miss one and you'll fall
Into this well called wanting and having
this thing called wanting and having it all
If you're gonna get there you're gonna have to walk
But first you'll have to crawl
Oh you know you gotta do it step by step
Miss one and you'll fall
Into this well called wanting and having it all

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Sawyer Brown formed in 1981, but didn't really find a good niche until around 1990. This particular song is from 1995. If you have time to browse around youtube for Sawyer Brown songs, they're definitely worth listening to. A few of the songs I highly recommend include the original song I was going to share today- Gypsies on Parade  ; as well as The Walk - which I'm likely to feature soon because it's SUCH an incredible song; All These Years  ; Treat Her Right ; and Heart Don't Fall Now (this one is the actual video from 1986ish, so the video quality is pretty bad. Fortunately the audio is good, and ironically it's the only version I can even find on youtube LOL)

Bite me, Cold weather!!!

In Fall 2007 we trekked across the country from Kentucky to Montana. Needless to say the climate is dramatically different from one to the other. I grew up with very humid summers, crisp cool weather in October, cold weather striking in November, many years HOPING for snow on Christmas, and spring showing it's beautiful face in early to mid March.
Our first winter up here was incredibly cold and icy, and felt like it lasted forever! We bought a small mobile home in a trailer court, and I wasn't even able to till the yard until April, much less attempt to plant a garden until May. Of course, I didn't do the research I should have before doing all the work, but work I did!

Then the winter sneaked in on us with somewhere around 8 inches of snow in the middle of October! Needless to say I lost quite a bit of my crop.

The next year it was pretty much the same story, only it did wait until a few days before halloween to frost, instead of full out snow. Luckily I didn't plant much of a garden because we were looking for a place to move most of the summer, plus I just had a baby, so I didn't have much time to do much of anything!
Then last year, we moved into yet another new house in the spring, but also took a long vacation, so I didn't get my seeds started early enough. I went to the local garden house to snag whatever they had left and grew some squash, cabbage, and bellpeppers.

THIS year I am DETERMINED to grow my vegetable garden the way I had it back in Kentucky- big and bountiful! I have a fairly large area in my back yard here, as well as the plot that's got more shade areas over at the trailer (which I now use for my dog grooming business). So I'm prepared with my layouts, research, compost, and organic fertilizers. But I was still having an issue with my seeds! I learned a really inexpensive, easy way to get seeds started in egg crates, but, unfortunately, because of how many plants I WANT to grow, I am lacking room to start the seeds! Initially I had planned on keeping them at the grooming shop, but the heater went out just before Christmas, so I knew it wouldn't work over there, as the cost of keeping them warm would be exponential. And here, I started a few trays out in my laundry room, but when I'm not running the dryer, it's pretty cold in there. So I just had no where to really get my seeds going.

I decided I wanted to get a small seed starting green house from a home improvement store. The family and I went out shopping and I found

this small plant tower greenhouse. It's just over 5 feet tall, 2 feet wide, and 1 foot deep. I thought it would work pretty great because of it's small size, and ease of use.

But, my husband, whom I just adore, always wants the best for me. He knows I've wanted to build an outdoor greenhouse to help extend my vegetable life outside, since our winters strike so early. So he decided I needed a larger greenhouse that I could use for the seed starting AND outside. So he picked this one out for me:

This thing is 6' x 8' x 7'.... and I LOVE it.
So after some measuring and configuring, we decided it would go in the living room to get my seeds going.
I moved my computer desk into the school area, and pulled the TV out and closer to the couch. Then built the greenhouse behind the TV.
And here it is:

The last picture is foggy because I have my humidifier in there to keep it nice and moist and warm :)

So NEENER NEENER Cold weather! You can't stop my seed starting now!

My Facebook has no room for drama

So it's been a couple of weeks since I've posted- firstly because every time I DID try to post, this website would screw up and not load right. Secondly, I try very hard to remain drama free, so when drama comes knocking, it's best for me to keep my mouth shut so I don't get sucked in.

There is a huge benefit and drawback to the internet, and that's making long distance friendships. Many of them are honest, heartfelt, and close because the woman on the other end of the internet is just as lonely, secluded, and longing for female companionship as I am. She has children and maybe a husband, and finds it hard to meet other women locally, just like me. Or maybe she has met other women locally, but none of them have similar interests or parenting styles, which makes it hard to connect. The amazing world of the internet has made it possible for women who DO have similar interests and parenting styles to connect and befriend one another. We laugh together, we cry together, we vent to one another, we praise one another.

And we hurt one another.

There's an old saying- 'you can't please everyone', and unfortunately, that rings true in the world of the internet. No matter how hard you try to be nice to everyone, to be neutral in a time of drama, or to just get along with everyone whether you really like them or not, sometimes you just can't please everyone. Someone is going to be mad that you said this or did that or are friends with that person. And in those times, those people will make choices that ultimately affect your friendship and possibly determine the future thereof.

Sometimes you try to tell yourself that 'it's just the internet, it's not that serious', or 'it should be easy to move on from this since we've never even met in person'- but it isn't always the case. When you've spent the last X amount of months or even years interacting with people on almost a daily basis, you tend to get to know them. You recognize their face in pictures, know the names of their children and husbands, understand what's going on in their lives, and support them in good times and bad.

So when the time comes that an internet friendship comes to an end, for whatever reason, it's OK for it to hurt. It's OK for it to make you upset, or even angry. And it's OK to seek a shoulder from other friends.

Just keep the drama off my Facebook.

7's Featured Music This Week.. and a little more.

2 songs are touching my heart this week. And I'd like to talk a little about them before I share them with you.

Did you know that you can change someone's future? The things you say have a huge impact on people.
I remember being little and hearing "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me". That's a great little saying... in theory. In practice, however, words are hurtful. They can cause harm. They can make someone change how they feel. They can also be beneficial. Something you say may be encouraging to someone who needs a little more backing up. One nice word could turn someone away from ending their life. One act of random kindness could give someone hope. One phone call .. one hug... one letter.

Please, think twice before you say something you might regret... something you might not mean.
And pretend that you're face to face with people on the internet, and then decide if you'd actually say what you're about to type. If you don't feel right saying it to someone's face, then it's probably not right to type it either.

It's better, and even easier, to walk away from someone and ignore them, or click away from the webpage, than to waste your time and energy being hateful.

If you know anyone that is thinking about suicide, please send them to the http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline and do what you can to help them get the help they need and deserve.

The first song I'd like to share is called "Moments" by Emerson Drive, and the second is "The Call" by Matt Kennon.

Moments-

(lyrics below)

The Call-

(lyrics below)

Moments

I was coming to the end of a long long walk
When a man crawled out of a cardboard box
Under the E. Street Bridge
Followed me on to it
I went out halfway across
With that homeless shadow tagging along
So I dug for some change
Wouldn't need it anyway
He took it lookin' just a bit ashamed
He said, You know, I haven't always been this way

I've had my moments, days in the sun
Moments I was second to none
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do
Like that plane ride coming home from the war
That summer my son was born
And memories like a coat so warm
A cold wind can't get through
Lookin' at me now you might not know it
But I've had my moments

I stood there tryin' to find my nerve
Wondered if a single soul on Earth
Would care at all
Miss me when I'm gone
That old man just kept hanging around
Lookin' at me, lookin' down
I think he recognized
That look in my eyes
Standing with him there I felt ashamed
I said, You know, I haven't always been this way

I've had my moments, days in the sun
Moments I was second to none
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do
Like the day I walked away from the wine
For a woman who became my wife
And a love that, when it was right,
Could always see me through
Lookin' at me now you might not know it
But I've had my moments

I know somewhere 'round a trashcan fire tonight
That old man tells his story one more time
(He says)

I've had my moments, days in the sun
Moments I was second to none
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do
Like that cool night on the E. Street Bridge
When a young man almost ended it
I was right there, wasn't scared a bit
And I helped to pull him through
Lookin' at me now you might not know it
Oh, lookin' at me now you might not know it
But I've had my moments


The Call

Today was gonna be the day
He'd already wrote the note
And parked that Chevrolet
At the end of that dead end road
Had his finger on the trigger; just about to end
everything
He was taking one last long breath; when he heard his
cell phone ring

And his best friend said man, where ya been?
We're heading down to the lake this weekend
You better not miss it, cause, buddy I swear
It won't be the same if you ain't there
And I told that girl that you like so much
You were coming along and her eyes lit up
I better let you go. Man, i really hope, i didn't catch
you in the middle of anything
He said you kinda did but I don't mind at all
I'm glad you called

In another town down the road
In the backseat of a car
Two 18 year olds had let a kiss go too far
He said how we gonna have this child?
We're both headed off to school
He convinced her late one night there's only one thing
to do
She was scared to death in that waiting room
When the nurse asked how far along are you?
She said 5 weeks and just about then her phone lit up
And his call came in
Saying, baby, I was wrong about everything
I already bought you a diamond ring we're gonna start a
life
Would you be my wife?
Boy or girl; pink or blue; yeah, either way
All she could say as she felt those tear drops fall was
I'm so glad you called

If someone you know is weighing on your mind
And needs a friend on the other end of the line
Don't hesitate what you say may seem so small
But who knows
They might be glad you called