Wake up call!

I don't like talking about other people's drama on here. I really don't.
But this is a topic I'm truly passionate about.

Family.

Marriage.

Whether you're 'legally' married or not, when you commit yourself to someone and agree to stand next to them for the rest of your life that means something. That means EVERYTHING.
Then, when you throw children into the mixture, it raises the stakes that much more.

Too many times I have seen, heard, read, and talked to people whose 'life partner' and them have decided one should go into the military or go off to school, or take a job that will keep them away from the house for a length of time, and during that time away, the partner at home has an affair.

So I'm going to lay it out in black and white. Since I can't bitch slap you face to face like you deserve.

GROW

UP

There is a giant, huge, incredible difference between a man and woman living together and one party falling out of love with the other, or treating the other badly, or just not giving the other any attention which drives the ignored party to cheat; and a man and a woman who both agree to have one party take this position away from the home for the betterment of the family and the other party cheating 'just because they're alone'.

When you and your partner make a joint decision that one of you is going to take a job for a company that is going to keep you away from your home, then it's your responsibility to be the lighthouse for them to come home to, the rock holding strong for them to cling to, and the arms for them to come home and wrap around them.
It is NOT a free pass to screw around.
It is NOT an opening for you to start texting with, talking to, or flirting with someone of the opposite sex.

I can certainly understand friendships with the opposite sex. Ironically, when my husband went to truck driving school for 6 weeks, then immediately into a position for another 6 weeks, I did find comfort in the friendship of another man. We hung out a lot, he became a very close friend to me. But we never crossed the line. We never even came close! We even slept in the same bed once, both fully clothed, with my 2 children in there with us. It was completely platonic. It just NEVER went there.

I made a commitment to my husband. And we discussed him taking that job before he left. So we both knew the reasons he was away from the house- to support our family. The plan was made, the dream was ahead of us- Owner Operator. He would eventually own his own truck and we could live in it, just us 4, and travel the country together.
Unfortunately after almost a year of driving, we were losing more than we were gaining. He just couldn't get the miles. So he had to come off the road and get a local job. But that's another story entirely.
The point is, during the 12 weeks I did not see him at all, and the 8 months following that I was lucky to see him for half a saturday a month, I NEVER, not one time even considered being with anyone else but him.

So why is it that I keep hearing these various stories of one person in the relationship going off to work, and the other one dropping this neglect bomb while they're gone, as their lame excuse for getting involved with someone else?

What happened to us? What happened to Americans? What happened to standing by our partner, for better or worse, thick and thin? What happened to commitment? Why are you SO reliant on others to validate you that you can't go 6 weeks without having that?
Or is it just sex? You can't go 6 weeks without sex? Give me a break.

GROW

UP

Realize that not only are you being completely selfish towards your partner, but you're also being selfish AND stupid when it comes to your children.

You're making a mistake.

You're screwing your life up.

You're screwing your child's life up.

And you can't get it back!

Once you've replaced that person- you can't expect them to take you back, so go into this affair assuming you've lost the other person completely, because more than likely you have.

Stop now before you do something you're going to regret.

Lyrics to Wake Up Call by Maroon 5

I didn't hear what you were saying.
I live on raw emotion baby
I answer questions never maybe
And I'm not kind if you betray me.
So who the hell are you to say we
Never would have made it babe.

[Bridge]
If you needed love
Well then ask for love
Could have given love
Now I’m taking love
And it’s not my fault
Cause you both deserve
What is coming now
So don’t say a word

[Chorus]
Wake up call
Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed
Don't you care about me anymore?
Don’t you care about me? I don't think so.
Six foot tall
Came without a warning so I had to shoot him dead
He won't come around here anymore
Come around here? I don't think so.

Would have bled to make you happy
You didn't need to treat me that way
And now you beat me at my own game
And now I find you sleeping soundly
And your lovers screaming loudly
Hear a sound and hit the ground

[Bridge]
[Chorus]

I'm so sorry darling
Did I do the wrong thing?
Oh, what was I thinking?
Is his heart still beating?



Lyrics to Whiskey Lullaby by Brad Paisley and Alison Krauss

She put him out like the burnin' end of a midnight cigarette
She broke his heart he spent his whole life tryin' to forget
We watched him drink his pain away a little at a time
But he never could get drunk enough to get her off his mind
Until the night

1st Chorus
He put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger
And finally drank away her memory
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength he had to get up off his knees
We found him with his face down in the pillow
With a note that said I'll love her till I die
And when we buried him beneath the willow
The angels sang a whiskey lullaby

The rumors flew but nobody knew how much she blamed herself
For years and years she tried to hide the whiskey on her breath
She finally drank her pain away a little at a time
But she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind
Until the night

2nd Chorus
She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger
And finally drank away his memory
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength she had to get up off her knees
We found her with her face down in the pillow
Clinging to his picture for dear life
We laid her next to him beneath the willow
While the angels sang a whiskey lullaby